Son of Bob can hand the ball off. Anything other than that scares Joe to death.

Rick Brown of the Lakeland Ledger has often come up with good reads this season. But there’s one subject that Brown is so far off base on it’s not even funny: Son of Bob, aka Brian Griese.

Brown waxes poetic about Griese again today, as if the guy is Carson Palmer or something. Either Brown has never witnessed Son of Bob quarterback before, or he devotes so much time to covering the Bucs he has tunnel vision.

Or possibly he has a debt to settle with the Griese family?

Today, Brown wrote about the Garcia-Griese quarterback controversy that Chucky has dug for himself. The column is so outrageous Joe really doesn’t know where to start.

Yet, something happened to the relationship between Gruden and Garcia between the start of the 2007 season and now.

It could have been Garcia’s unsteady performance in the playoff game or his openly demanding a new contract.

Gee, you don’t think Chucky sitting Garcia down in the latter part of the season, thereby preventing Garcia’s seven-figure contract bonus from kicking in has anything to do with Garcia being even moderately perturbed? It wasn’t Garcia’s decision to sit himself, it was Chucky’s call. And it cost Garcia a cool million and maybe the Bucs a playoff win. And Garcia is supposed to bend over and grunt, “Thank you, sir, may I have another?”

Hey Rick, pretend you had a quota of columns to write each week. If you meet your quota you get a helluva bonus at year’s end. Your editor tells you to take a break and only write one column next week. Then, come December, you get demoted from the Bucs to cover Kathleen High School girls basketball and not get your bonus.

Why? Because you only wrote one column in a particular week in September. Would you be on good terms with your editor then?

You see, Griese managed the Tampa Bay offense. He made enough plays early to help his squad get a lead and maintain it. He converted third downs and did not throw an interception (he did lose a fumble after getting hit on the blind side).

Yet, will it be good enough when the Bucs face the Dallas Cowboys? Will it be good enough to make it to the playoffs?

For now, Gruden believes so.

More nonsense. This “managing” the offense is a load of crap. You can hire a kid out of high school to hand the ball off. Unless a team has a defense as good as Baltimore’s in the 2001 Super Bowl, “managing” an offense doesn’t get the job done. How successful were the Bucs using that philosophy under Tony Dungy?

A quarterback must be used as a weapon, not a liability. A decent team doesn’t hide a quarterback. If you are not playing for a Super Bowl, then why the hell are you even on the field?

But thanks for bringing up that fumble by Griese when the Bucs had a chance to put the Falcons away Sunday. Turnovers, thy name is Brian Griese.

Griese has thrown for more than 18,000 yards in his career. He is now 43-36 as a starter (10-7 with the Bucs). Yet, there is one stat that stands out, Griese has never played in a playoff contest.

Gee, I wonder why? Good grief Rick, think about it: If Griese was worth a nickel, do you think Chicago would have let him go?

 This guy is so miserable, he couldn’t beat out Kyle Orton or Rex Grossman — KYLE ORTON!!! Take a moment for that to sink in. Outside of possibly Minnesota, no NFL team has more stiffs at quarterback than Chicago. And Son of Bob is such a talent, he couldn’t unseat either Orton or Grossman!

Think about it Rick: Arguably the game’s best quarterback coach, Mike Shanahan, let Son of Bob go. Why exactly do you think that is? I mean, this guy couldn’t even beat out Jay Fiedler of all people in Miami. Seriously!

And lastly, if Son of Bob was worth a crap, why did Chucky cut him two years ago?

For Griese, it was a good return to action at Raymond James Stadium. The last time he played as a Buc, he got hurt and was released in the offseason. He is a winner again. At least for now.

A winner? What exactly has Son of Bob won in the NFL? Sure, he won a national championship in college. So did Jay Barker and Craig Krenzel. In case you didn’t know it, this is the NFL, not NCAA.

So I guess you call Dieter Brock a winner, too, I mean he was the starting QB on a team that got to the NFC championship? At least Brock had an excuse: he was German! What’s Son of Bob’s excuse?

Teams that go far in the playoffs are settled at quarterback position. The Bucs are settled for now.

No, Rick. Teams that have good quarterbacks, or a sick defense that comes around once in a generation, go far in the playoffs. The Bucs, especially with Son of Bob calling signals, have neither.